"...maybe if guys just aren't that into you that they should just state one thing and only one thing: I'M NOT READY. MOVE ALONG NOW. SHOO! at least that's being honest. no grey areas."
exp.4 - why (i think) guys do NOT say those words.
fact is, everyone's selfish. if you're a girl, you'd know how it is to wanna 'keep the fans'. come on, admit it. we all do it.
a guy comes along, clearly interested, average looking (according to your taste), but 'not your cuppa tea' - boyfriend wise. still, you do things (even just little things) to keep that attention. some of you may use the "maybe i would fall for him someday, so i just wanna keep him around" excuse, while some may go the extreme and say "that's just me. i can't help it that my 'normal' self misleads him" bullcrap. - im not judging.
point it, guys do that too. yes, some may 'sincerely' say that to spare our feelings (although it really does more damage in the long run), but really, no one would willingly cut out 'attention' from their lives. everyone loves a spare boat. everyone needs a fall-back plan. everyone wants to keep that shred of hope that someone out there, despite all their other rejections in life, still "wants them".
thats one perspective. but hop on to the other side. if you're the spare-boat, the fall-back plan, the 'mere assurance' in that person's lives, ask yourself, what are you doing? why are you knowingly throwing yourself at someone, only to play their second fiddle?
a quote we should live by: "dont make someone a priority when to them, you're just an option."
exp.5 - why (i think) you should not buy into their 21st centuary cliche excuses.
if there's one thing guys have learn from 'the complicatedness' of girls, its their ability to "not mean what they say". we (girls) have read dozens of articles on how guys complain "girls say one thing, but mean another", "i don't know" actually means "you're the asshole!", and "nothing" actually means "are you blind?! of course i'm mad!"... but guys are no different. at least in this matter they aren't.
if you havent already read the infamous 'he's just not that into you' book, read it! lame ass excuses such as "don't wanna ruin the friendship" and "i'm not ready for commitments" should really only translate to mean you're not the one they want.
it'd be debateable whether that means they'd want you at a later time, but even if so, that'd only be because they didn't find anyone else, hence decide to settle for the one who's a sure thing. (also called the safe bet, the easy way out, the 'done deal')
after all, you can run a marathon and dream of all the cold fizzy refreshment awaiting you at the finish line, but who wouldn't stop for water handily given out along the way, rite? and just in case you missed the point, you are the WATER. do you really wanna be that person for them? or the better question to ask is, do you think that's what you deserve?
there'll always be someone out there who'd dream of you as that prize at the finish line. that's the standard we should live by when it comes to men. don't ever let him make you compromise that.
exp.4 - why (i think) guys do NOT say those words.
fact is, everyone's selfish. if you're a girl, you'd know how it is to wanna 'keep the fans'. come on, admit it. we all do it.
a guy comes along, clearly interested, average looking (according to your taste), but 'not your cuppa tea' - boyfriend wise. still, you do things (even just little things) to keep that attention. some of you may use the "maybe i would fall for him someday, so i just wanna keep him around" excuse, while some may go the extreme and say "that's just me. i can't help it that my 'normal' self misleads him" bullcrap. - im not judging.
point it, guys do that too. yes, some may 'sincerely' say that to spare our feelings (although it really does more damage in the long run), but really, no one would willingly cut out 'attention' from their lives. everyone loves a spare boat. everyone needs a fall-back plan. everyone wants to keep that shred of hope that someone out there, despite all their other rejections in life, still "wants them".
thats one perspective. but hop on to the other side. if you're the spare-boat, the fall-back plan, the 'mere assurance' in that person's lives, ask yourself, what are you doing? why are you knowingly throwing yourself at someone, only to play their second fiddle?
a quote we should live by: "dont make someone a priority when to them, you're just an option."
exp.5 - why (i think) you should not buy into their 21st centuary cliche excuses.
if there's one thing guys have learn from 'the complicatedness' of girls, its their ability to "not mean what they say". we (girls) have read dozens of articles on how guys complain "girls say one thing, but mean another", "i don't know" actually means "you're the asshole!", and "nothing" actually means "are you blind?! of course i'm mad!"... but guys are no different. at least in this matter they aren't.
if you havent already read the infamous 'he's just not that into you' book, read it! lame ass excuses such as "don't wanna ruin the friendship" and "i'm not ready for commitments" should really only translate to mean you're not the one they want.
it'd be debateable whether that means they'd want you at a later time, but even if so, that'd only be because they didn't find anyone else, hence decide to settle for the one who's a sure thing. (also called the safe bet, the easy way out, the 'done deal')
after all, you can run a marathon and dream of all the cold fizzy refreshment awaiting you at the finish line, but who wouldn't stop for water handily given out along the way, rite? and just in case you missed the point, you are the WATER. do you really wanna be that person for them? or the better question to ask is, do you think that's what you deserve?
there'll always be someone out there who'd dream of you as that prize at the finish line. that's the standard we should live by when it comes to men. don't ever let him make you compromise that.
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